WISE ADVICE FOR MAKING NEW YEARS RESOLUTIONS:
It is a well known fact that nearly all New Years resolutions are broken almost immediately after New Years is over. For this reason, I suggest that everybody firmly resolve the exact polar opposite of what their desired outcome and personal accomplishments for the coming year are. By doing this, you virtually assure the year will go as you wished when you break your resolutions, and...if not, you can always glibly claim credit for remaining faithful to your word, and with great discipline and resolve, carrying out your New Years resolution, unlike some OTHER people you know! It's a win-win situation!
Sooooo...Let us all resolve to become lazy, unmotivated, unpopular, gluttonous, grotesque, bugger picking, knuckle dragging trolls, completely lacking in personal hygiene and sex appeal, and maybe even a vow of poverty may be in order. This way we will all either be well disciplined, highly motivated, successful, driven, attractive, and possibly even wealthy successes in life, or, we will be able to rightly point out how well we did indeed carry out our New Years resolution.
Happy New Year!
:o)
John David Feagin
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